45 secrets to a happy marriage

Our local news channel had this list on their website. 45 Secrets to a happy marriage.
Lets see if they got it right.
 I will, of course, add my 2 ¢.

1)  If you think she's beautiful, tell her.
     Damn right- this should be #1. Although...I think it should read, if he looks good..tell him. You don't want him to think he's not the pretty one in the relationship...

2)  Make dinner together. Eat dinner together. Go to bed together.
      Make dinner together? That would never work in the House of Stone. Greg's not the cooking type. I'm sure if I ever made him help me he would go all Emril on me. Bam!

3)  Your fantasy life should revolve around your wife, not your football team.
     Mama likey. This one stays.

4)  Life is short. Say "I love you" at least once every day.
    All jokes aside..this one is important and when he forgets to tell you text him...and make him feel guilty.

5)  The more time you spend trying to change your spouse, the less time you have for improving yourself.
   Eh. Some of us don't need improvement. When I say some of us I mean me. I think this one should read...there is always room for change.

6)  One of the sexiest things you can do in bed is to serve your spouse a nice breakfast.
   Disagree. One of the sexiest things you can do in bed is...well not breakfast!!! Just a hint..it has nothing to do with food. Just sayin.

7)  Talk to each other, not at each other. And really listen.
   Agreed. If he starts to zone out throw the word nipple in...that will always bring him back.

8)  It doesn't matter what you think you're fighting about. It always comes down to a choice between fear and love. Choose wisely.
   I don't know about you..but when we're fighting it totally matters what we are fighting about! Fear and love have nothing to do with it. It's all about right and wrong. Which I should state that 99.9% of the time I'm the right one. (at least I think so!)

9)  Write this into your wedding vows: "I promise to faithfully replace the toilet paper whenever I use the last of it."
  Shit. This one applies to me. Sometimes I use the bathroom in the dark..and how am I supposed to know I used the last of it?!  I've even tried to blame the hubby for my leaving it empty, and it backfired.

10) Do things together. Do things apart.
  They should define "things" . Golf..ok. Pedi's with the girls..ok. Diddling the neighbor..not ok.

11)  Career, personal goals and family are important, but nothing is more important than your relationship.
    Career, personal goals..yes. Family is part of your relationship, so you can't put them on the less than important level. Unless we're talking about the weirdo step cousin that is always in your business. That family, yes. Your immediate family..no.

12)  The cruelest question you can ask a husband: "Notice anything different?"
   This is the BEST question you can ask your husband. It's the relationship version of a pop quiz. It's always good to keep him on his toes.Who doesn't love to watch the look on his face when he is trying to figure out what the F is different.

13)  Be your spouse's biggest cheerleader.
   I agree and I wear a cheerleader uniform too. OK...I'm kidding. Greg would probably laugh and my self esteem would be ruined for life.

14)  If you've truly forgiven your spouse for something, you'll never bring it up again.
   This falls under the forgive and forget category. There is also the forgive, but never ever forget category. I rarely put anything in the vault. Which I'm sure annoys the crap out of Greg. But..hey...that's just me.

15)  Your wife doesn't need to know that you think that chick across the street has a great figure. (Not that there's anything wrong with noticing.)
   Or the chick on TV which is the only reason you watch the show, and your hubby shouldn't know you think  Maks on Dancing with the stars is sex in a tight outfit- but when you drool, and tell your spouse to rewind...it's a giveaway.

16)  Be spontaneously ridiculous and unabashedly silly. Make your spouse laugh. It nourishes your souls.
   Agreed. Just don't ever laugh in bed. Total mojo killer.

17)  No one person can give you everything you need.
   Well of course not. If you need milk you have to rely on the cow...well someone milking that said cow. If you need a hair cut you clearly wouldn't want your spouse doing it!!!!

18)  If he forgets your anniversary, don't freak out about it. If he forgets your name, do.
  Get married on a date he can't forget. 07-07-07. Does not knowing your middle name fall under this category? Greg still has to pause to remember my middle name. Honey..say it with me...Dawn. It's not Lynn.

19)  "What can I do for you, honey?"
    This one is touchy. You might get an answer you weren't prepared to give. There is one standard answer that will follow this question about 75% of the time. You should be able to guess it.

20)  He's not a mind reader. If you want him to know what you're thinking or feeling, you have to tell him.
  He's not a mind reader for sure and when he thinks he can read your mind he is way off.

21)  If you make your kids the center of your universe, there's going to be one massive black hole when they finally grow up and leave.
   This should say "Find a balance between romance and the kids. You'll need that romance later when you are too old to make babies and your babies moved out."

22)  Recognize your spouse's weaknesses, but focus on the strengths.
  For sure. You need to know what you can push off on your hubby to do, and what you will have to do for yourself!

23)  If you always have to win the argument, you'll eventually lose the relationship.
  That's why you let him think he won the argument.

24)  Only if she asks: "No, honey, that dress isn't very flattering." (Not "It makes you look fat.")
   Yes, and never, I repeat never, moo. Or say she looks "fine". Fine is never good.

25)  Find someone to talk to about your marriage, but never talk your spouse down to anyone.
    But always tell the really funny stories.The ones that your spouse would KILL you if they found out you told. Shhhhh!

26)  When you finally realize your spouse is as flawed and messed up as you are, you can leave the rose-colored fantasy behind and start building a real adult relationship.
    You should have come to this realization week one. If you still think your spouse is perfect and does nothing wrong you are living in a fantasy world. Step away from the fairy tale book and grow the heck up!

27)  If your wife suddenly starts tanning and exercising a lot, might as well call the lawyer now. (This one came from a recently divorced friend.)
  I call foul!!! What happened to wanting to look good for yourself? For your hubby? This one is a load of crap!!

28)  Every little disagreement doesn't have to snowball into a discussion about "the relationship."
  And...never start a sentence with "we need to talk"

29)  It's actually OK to go to bed angry sometimes, as long as you agree to discuss it in the morning.
  ...and it's ok to go to bed angry, and lock the bedroom door so your hubby has to sleep on the couch. Not that he was going to even think about coming to the bedroom anyway.

30)  She's your wife, not your mommy. Go clean up after your own self.
   So true.

31)  It's not your job to make your spouse happy. (It's not possible, either.)
   Damn right. BUT...it is his job to make me happy..right?!

32)  Appreciate the love your spouse has for you. It's not something you're entitled to. It's something you earn.
   This should actually read you should appreciate everything your spouse does for you, for if you take advantage you may find yourself without...

33)  When he says, "You might have a point there, honey," what he's leaving out is "if you weren't so full of crap."
  Unless...you WERE right. He could also be leaving out "oh shit she's smarter than me"

34)  Create your own traditions for the holidays.
   I got nothing for this one. I guess it's true...

35)  Sharing your secrets (and hopes and fears) is the secret to true intimacy.
  Sharing fantasies is the true secret to intimacy. Unless you start the conversation with.."honey I would love you to wear a diaper" ..that's just weird.

36)  Want to get lucky tonight? Do a load of laundry, start to finish.
   Only wash your clothes. You know damn well if you wash mine you will shrink the shit out of my favorite sweater. Which will lead to a fight, which will lead to not getting lucky for at least 2 days. Also, never say "We'll go out and buy you a new one"...she doesn't want a new one. She wants the one you shrunk the shit out of.

37)  Listen to other people's advice, but make your own choices.
   Depends on who's advice..mom's ..ok. Larry the Cable Guy....not so much. Hugh Heffner...no f-ing way.

38)  Argue naked. It's guaranteed to keep a minor disagreement from turning into a big fight.
   Oh hell no. There are way too many giggly spots to argue naked. I'm pretty animated when I'm mad. That's a giggle only Jello should be proud of. AND... you know your hubby will point it out and it will only make you madder than you already were. Although...man boobs could come into play. Hummmm.

39)  Random expressions of love and affection are the best ones. (Foot rubs count double. Feet are gross!)
   So very true but stay the heck away from my feet.

40)  Being selfish and being in love are incompatible.
   Unless you love yourself. Just sayin..

41)  Just because you know where someone's buttons are doesn't mean you have to push them.
   This is what makes life fun.Unless it's my buttons being pushed...

42)  If your dog gets more snuggle time in bed with your wife than you do, you're in trouble.
   Or...if your pillow gets more snuggle time..there's a problem. Unless you have a new  huge king size bed and you both sleep away from the neutral zone. 

43)  Money is something to talk about, not fight about.
  Unless he's spending it all on the 3 P's. ponies, porn and prostitutes.Then...you have yourself a real problem.

44)  When all is said and done, you can hang onto your pride or you can hang onto your relationship.
   Ok then...

45)  And, finally, here's a great one from Ogden Nash. "To keep your marriage brimming with love in the wedding cup  whenever you're wrong, admit it  whenever you're right, shut up."
   Can't argue with that...

 
I really think I should make my own list, and submit it to the news station......

What a weekend!!

I'm tired. Not even kidding. I guess coming off a super active weekend
will do that to you! On Saturday we took Madison & Maverick to the zoo.
This was Maverick's first time, and Greg hasn't been to the zoo in years
and years, so it was a first for both of them! I actually never thought
I would get Greg to go to the zoo, so he really surprised me!
Let me start the zoo story with..it was hot. Sunny and hot. So after we
loaded the kids with sunblock, we started our trek at the zoo. The first
stop was the seals which Mav really liked. I'm sure it was because they
were in water! I have to say the seals were pretty cute!
We bounced from animal to animal, getting Maverick in and out of the
stroller so he could see the animals. He did wonderful. Maddye wanted to
ride the camel, so Maddye, Maverick and I did just that. Riding a camel
was not fun. Now it could be that I'm old and fatter than I'd like to
be, but holy heck it was hard to ride. I was hanging on to Maverick,
while hanging on to the camel with my thighs. Which are out of shape.
Which were hurting when I got off the camel. The kiddies had fun, and we
got a picture of our ride..so that's all that matters. I will tell you,
I doubt Sally the Camel and I will ever tango again. Just sayin..
The kids also loved the monkeys (who doesn't?!) and the fish. Maverick
tried to feed the fish a fry. It was beyond cute! Maverick met a donkey
that seemed to really like him. So Maverick was touching him through the
fence, and the donkey was letting him. Then...Maverick stuck his finger
up the donkey's nose. If donkeys could have a WTF face, this donkey had it.
All in all the zoo was a great day. We had lunch, walked around all day,
and had a really good time. Maverick fell asleep on our way to the car,
but he was a trooper. We're so lucky!
On Sunday I took Maddye to Cedar Point, with my niece Adrianna, and her
Mom, Nielah. (For those of you who don't live near Ohio, Cedar Point is
a huge amusement park near us) It was HOT. Maddye loves Cedar Point.
She is such a thrill seeker! We went from ride to ride, with two
giggling girls. Adrianna loved the Calypso- so much we went on it 6
times. That's a lot of spinning. The girls went in a sprinkler fountain,
and Nielah and I were secretly hoping to get splashed!! Did I mention it
was hot?! How hot, you ask? Well my deodorant melted in my car. Degree
soup is awesome. I'm not sure what swamp ass really is, but I just might
have had it. I was a sweaty hot mess. The entire drive home I was
fantasizing about a shower. Hot right?!
We didn't get home till after 11pm, and I'm tired as heck today, but it
was so worth it. Maddye and I had a great day.
Maverick stayed home with Daddy. They went and visited Grandma & Grandpa
Stone for a bit and from what I hear Maverick didn't miss me. (I'm sure
he did!!!!)
I'm kinda hoping next weekend is empty without a single thing to do!
Fingers crossed!

Birthday Dinner...

Lobsters are cute right? Well..kinda.
I guess I should start from the beginning. Greg decided to take me to a restaurant in downtown Cleveland, called Morton's. Real fancy shamancy type restaurant. We walk in, and Greg tells them reservation for Greg Stone, and immediately she says "Happy Birthday Becki". Now I should also say on the way there I asked Greg if they were going to sing or make me put on a stupid hat..because I'm so not into public embarrassment. Greg said no. So when they said Happy Birthday I thought...oh crap. We sit down, and after a bit our waiter comes, again using our names, and wishing me a happy birthday. The menu is printed with "Happy Birthday Becki" on the top. Then it happens. They roll a table over to our table, and on the table is a sample of the meat cuts, the fish cuts, the veggies, and a lobster. Then the lobster moves, and I see it foaming from the gills. Our waiter says "yep it's alive" in a really cheery voice. Like that of a serial killer who has no soul. We had to ask our waiter to move the lobster. I couldn't have his little eyes on me...screaming "save me". I, of course, couldn't order the lobster, so I ordered shrimp, Greg ordered filet. I wonder if he would have ordered the steak if a live cow was there staring at him. Eh..it's Greg. He would have. Through the entire dinner the lobster was watching me. He wanted me to take him home and let him live in our tub. I considered it. Greg said no. I did ask our waiter what the market price of saving a lobster was. I'm pretty sure he thought I was nuts. He then gave me some bs story about how lobsters do not feel pain. I had a blackberry. I googled it from our table. They do feel pain. Which made me even sadder. I wonder what PETA would say.
Having said all that, our dinner was really good. Greg actually closed his eyes when he was chewing his filet. He wanted to savor every bite. At the end, our
waiter comes over with my cheesecake, and lights a candle and sings- quietly- but still sung. Only the tables close to us heard. Our picture was taken. Greg loves the picture because his filet is in it. I should have taken a picture with the lobster- just to give him one last piece of excitement before he was thrown in boiling water. Alive. Ugh.
By the way, I turned 26. Ok. 29. Ok, Ok...33. I feel 25 though. Does that count for something?

Blogging on the go!

Well I've decided that if I'm going to have any chance at keeping up
with this blog, I'm going to have to do it on the go! This way I can
blog from my phone, or email from work when I can grab a few seconds!
Stay tuned..next post is all about my birthday weekend.

--
Becki Stone
Project Manager

MBI Products Company, Inc.
801 Bond Street
Elyria, OH 44035

Office: 440.322.6500
Fax: 440.322.1900

www.mbiproducts.com

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A long overdue update.

What's new? Well for starters our baby is 2! On June 20th, Maverick turned 2. We had a big birthday party for him on June 18th, complete with a bounce house! He had a blast, and loved every gift he got! For his actual birthday we got a small cake (from the bakery case- that happened to be yellow and aqua..humm meant to be?!) and he opened the presents we got for him. He didn't quite get the blow out the candle thing- although he did blow after it was blown out..oh well..next year! His birthday was a very emotional day for me. Last year he was still being held hostage in Kaz, and we didn't know if we would ever bring him home. This year we celebrated with our crazy baby! I can't even say how thankful we are for him.

As for how he's doing- he's great. Growing, eating, getting into things..just like any other 2 year old. He's talking up a storm, and I (and my mom) hear "Mom" about a hundred times a day. He had eye surgery on May 13th, and he's doing great. We have a follow up on the 28th, so we will see what the doctor says about how his eyes are adjusting. I think they look great- they still cross every now and then, but that could be due to the fact he needs glasses eventually. He was also circumcised - which healed very well, and we're glad we got it done. (Yes we know it is not medically necessary, and yes we know we didn't have to do it. We decided to get it done. Nuff said)Maverick loves Maddye. He says Maddye so cute! They are quite the pair, and when the two of them get going it is loud and giggly. I love it..most of the time! Maddye is a mother hen, and is very loving to her brother. She is the big sister I knew she would be.

Maddye is officially a 5th grader, and is loving summer break. I'm very jealous of her! (well not being in 5th grade, but for having the summer off!)

The above picture is of Maverick's birthday cake. I thought it was way too cute. Maverick thought it was funny and he wasn't interested in eating it at all. Maverick hasn't quite found his sweet tooth yet! Don't worry..he's a Stone..he will find it soon.

Lets see...what else do I have?! How about this- I have a new position at work which keeps me way busier during the day. I love it, and I have my very own office..with a window. Super classy. Did I mention it is a brand new office? We just moved into our newly renovated offices yesterday. Did I mention we will have a huge gym? Locker room? Lounge? Kitchen? I'm beyond lucky. My job rocks.

What else? We've been busy with landscaping which I hope is done. Well I know we have a little more to do, but we're close to being done. Finally.

What else? My 33rd birthday is Sunday. How the heck did I get to be 33?! Seems like just yesterday I turned 30. I don't think I want anything this year...after all- did you see those 2 cute kids in the picture above?! They are the best gifts ever.

In honor of Maverick's birthday we donated to the Karakastek baby house. Enough for an entire months worth of food. It still makes me sick how skinny Maverick was when we picked him up, so hopefully this will help the babies we left behind.

I was asked the other day if we would adopt again. As much as I would love to, it isn't in the cards for us. Although I do believe that God has a plan for us, and who knows what that might be.

I'm going to end this post with "holy crap Maverick is Greg" I can't tell you how many times we get told Maverick looks just like Daddy. I can't tell you how many times I look at him and think to myself "how is this not his biological son". It is unreal.

Until next time....

Kazapalooza here we come!!!!

We're leaving tomorrow for Kazapalooza!!!!!!! I can't believe we are finally able to attend Kazapalooza! I've waited 2 years to be able to go, and I'm sooooo excited to go this year!!! I'm beyond excited to meet all my adoption buddies in real life!!! Florida- here we come!!!!!!
Watch out Kazapalooza- Maverick is taking over!

What's new?

Ok so I'm failing at posting on my blog. I'm trying to be better. I really am. I'm at a loss at where to start. I'll start with my house. It's like Toys R Us and Babies R Us had a baby, and that baby threw up all over my house. I have toys everywhere. I no longer shake my head when I find a car under the table, in the garbage, in my purse, or even in the tub. Thankfully, no toys have been in the toilet. His hands have though. That was a special day.
Diapers in the laundry. Yep...not even kidding. We, and when I say we, I mean I, somehow washed a diaper. Boy those things are absorbent. Thankfully we have a front loader so it didn't tear it to shreds. I will say reaching in and feeling a soggy wet diaper was a bit out of my league. I should have taken a picture, and of course I rewashed the entire load. Yes, my carbon footprint is bigger these days.
Speaking of laundry, holy dirty clothes. This boy can seriously go through 3 outfits a day. I'm considering getting him some waterproof baby clothes just so he can shake off. Maybe, just maybe my laundry will get caught up. Or, maybe not.
Poop. We have alot more poop. When I say we, I mean Maverick, and well Greg. That's a whole other story. I'm pretty sure Maverick enjoys pooping in a nice clean diaper. I'm also pretty sure he enjoys pooping just so I say "YUCK, YOU STINK" which I do every time, because he does. He giggles and says yuck right back at me. It's a game I tell you.
My car looks like Gerber had a giant convention, and didn't clean up. I'm not really sure how it happened, but holy crap it's bad. Oh, and a bottle under your seat that you didn't know existed smells. Bad. The 13 drops that came out of the bottle made my entire car smell like a cross between rotten milk and a dead cow. Needless to say I was rocking a classic taxi cab air freshener for a week. You should also know, you should never, I repeat never, open said bottle. Just throw that puppy away. The smell you have in your car is nothing compared to the punch it unleashes when the nipple comes off. Save yourself and throw it out. It will decompose in like a million years, don't worry.
My purse use to be so neat. Use to be so organized. Now I have matchbox cars, bottle caps, diapers, wipes, puffs, and who knows what else in the bottom. It weighs about 37 pounds and doesn't snap very well. Ugh I'm so ashamed.
So apparently I pushed my diaper bag to the limit. I will admit I like to pack plenty of "just in case" items, because you just never know when you will need them. Maverick spends the day with my mom while I work, so 3 outfits (yes three..see above) extra socks, food, diapers, bottles, and the "just in case" stuff. Not alot right? Wrong. First the zipper broke. Then the sides gave way. So it went in the trash. (yes I know..carbon footprint is getting bigger) I searched and searched for the perfect diaper bag. I found nothing that fit my needs. I did however find a giant plastic tote I got from my previous job. Giant, plastic, tough zipper and it's lime green. Awesome.
What else is new? Maverick is doing awesome. He's come so far since we brought him home 6 months ago. He's walking, talking, and being a typical boy. He's just a little smaller than boys his age- but we're working on it. One french fry at a time. I'm kidding...sort of. My dad has Maverick addicted to fries. They are like crack to him. I keep telling myself it could be worse. Although, he says "fry" if he sees any kid of paper bag, and yelled out "fry frysss" from the back seat when I ordered ice cream the other day. So, no I don't think he has a severe problem...yet.
We went to the adoption doctor again a couple weeks ago, and he's gained 6 pounds and grew 3.5 inches. She said his growth is incredible, and showed us on the growth chart how big of a jump he has made. He's still not on the actual chart, but I'll take a great growth any day. He has to have eye surgery on May 13th, so we are getting him circumcised at the same time. I know, it sounds horrible, but I would rather him go under once, and be done with it. I'm freaking out a little now, and I know I'll be a mess that day. He's in great hands, but he's my baby!! I know it's going to be the longest hour of my life.
Maverick is talking so much. His words so far are: mama, dada, baba, baby, car, thank you, tickle, bath, two, three, five, hi, bye, deer, nice, book, look, monkey, Maddye, bee, no, yes, yeah, shoe, yuck and I'm sure I'm missing some. He is starting to repeat everything you say. Which means the toilet tongue I have needs to take a vacation.
He's a boy. ALL boy. I can't believe how different boys are from girls!!!! He is rough with his toys, likes to play rough and loves a thrill. He's a cuddle bug when he wants to be, so I have the best of both worlds. He loves water, and if there is any water any where he will find it, and soak his clothes. I see alot of puddle jumping and bird bath splashing in our future.
He's stubborn like his daddy. He's Greg in a 19 pound body. I believe God had a good ole time making Maverick for us. He looks like Greg, acts like Greg and makes the same faces Greg does. It's so crazy. He was totally meant to be our son. There is no question about it.
Maddye is an awesome big sister. Maverick loves her. When she gets home from school he gets a huge smile and squeals. They have a great bond, and it's fun to watch. The two of them can get giggling and you can't do anything but laugh at it. Maddye jumped right into being a sibling after being an only child for 10 years- which I knew she would. She's an awesome kid who constantly thinks of others first, and she has a heart of gold.
Tonight Maddye had Maverick in her room to make something for Mother's Day. I don't know that for sure, but she told me "Mom, I have Maverick, and don't come in" so I'm pretty sure that's what it is. Seeing them together makes my heart happy.
I'm so blessed. My house is a freaking train wreck, but in the end that doesn't matter. So what if we regularly step on toys. So what if my car is a mess, and it stinks. It's all worth it.